Step right up, folks!... won't cost you a cent!... see John McCain, a once respected Senator!... see John McCain, once known to be something of a voice for reason... see John McCain's Presidential aspirations explode!
Hurry, Hurry! The show starts now! Watch! You'll be amazed as the old fella croaks out his lines, then trots out a complete snowbilly who knows nothing of how the executive branch of our government works to be his running mate.
Watch with amazement folks, as our economy takes the express elevator to hell, John McCain tries distraction techniques to make the electorate forget that it is precisely the policies that McCain himself has espoused for decades that have led us to where we are today.
Have you ever seen anything like it, ladies and gentleman? Listen as Johnny "Walnuts" McCain fries in his own Botoxed fat, wondering what the hell just happened! Watch him begin to blame the "mainstream media". See, and be amazed to hear, Senator McCain and Governor Sarah "Bullwinkle" Palin speak about coming to Washington to "reform" our government without acknowledging that it is THEIR party that has screwed the pooch so hard, the poor dog may not live.
You may never get another chance to see it in your lifetimes , ladies and gentlemen... you may never see a Presidential ticket for a major party, be so completely bereft of ANY new ideas (aside from shooting game animals from helicopters, or Alaska seceding from the union), that the campaign implodes a month before the actual election.
Yes, indeed, folks! Yes indeed. The stage is set for the final act!
Get ready, because I am sure that you won't want to miss this one...
Watch as John McCain and "Shotgun" Sarah Palin pull out the last tool that any good Republican (and no small number of Democrats) use when the chips are down: They resort to the tried and true tactic that I call: "SCARE THE WHITE PEOPLE" In this scenario, McCain and his surrogates spend their time with not-very-nuanced ads that are nothing more than race-baiting, fear-mongering devices. Blame minorities and immigrants for the sub-prime meltdown. Blame illegal immigrants. Blame the federal government, blame anyone you can... but, for the love of God, make sure that anyone they blame isn't white, or, like palin says; "isn't like us".
Here, gentle patrons, watch this final scene, as John McCain stirs the pot and starts throwing garbage to see what sticks. Be disgusted as Sarah "drop the G" Palin says that Barack Obama "isn't like us". See John McCain throw away every shred of decency that he ever possessed, in a naked grab at power. Power that he desires so badly that he will sell his very soul to obtain it.
There you have it, friends. I am sad to report that John McCain has officially lost his f***ing (note the G, sarah) mind. Senator McCain has decided that to salvage the rejection of his message by the electorate, he will now spend more than 90 percent of what is left of his communications budget, on negative attack ads.
For shame, Senator McCain. What about your pledge to run a clean campaign? What about "straight talk"? What about reaching across the aisle? You clearly want to be President so badly, that you will now do the things that Karl Rove and company did to you eight years ago?
For shame Johnny Walnuts. It's bad enough you have no ideas, bad enough that your time passed eight years ago, bad enough that you are trying to ignore years of your own bad judgement... but to sink to these newer, even lower levels at the end of your career will mean a permanent stain on your legacy of service.
Time for the straight talk express to head back to Arizona.