Gunfighter: A Modern Warrior's Life

The Great Interview Experiment: MJP

I recently took part (again) in the Great Interview Experiment, and if you aren't familiar with it, go here.  Anyway, I was interviewed a couple of weeks ago by my new BFF, Becky.  Now, I get to finally bring you my interview partner.

Please meet Mary.  She is the blogger behind A Room of Mama's Own. 

I suppose we should just get right down to it:

Thanks for taking the time to answer my questions, Mary... I know that you are a busy lady, so spending your time going back and forth via email with a guy you don't know probably wasn't high on your list of priorities. 

Before we start, could you give the readers a little personal background about yourself?

Hi.  I'm MPJ (Mary P Jones).  Well, not really.  That's a pseudonym.  Those are even pseudonymous initials.  But that makes sense if you consider that I'm happily married (as odd as it sounds) to a recovering sex addict.  (Think Tiger Woods or Bill Clinton trying -- sincerely -- and succeeding -- mostly -- to clean up their acts.)  I'm a stay-at-home mom caring for our two elementary school-aged children, one of whom is autistic. 

I blog at A Room of Mama's Own about, well, whatever I feel like writing about, which tends to be mostly addiction recovery, autism, parenting and spirituality.  I've made some wonderful real life friends through blogging and have learned a lot.  And I absolutely love it.  Every minute of it.  Well, almost every minute.  I have to admit that spam and trolls piss me off, but every minute I'm not dealing with them, I really love.

Thanks, Mary!  I have to begin this interview by asking you a question that is near to my heart:  Do you watch television?  If so, what are your favorite shows, and why do you like them?

Yes, I love television.  I watch a whole plethora of what my husband Mark calls "crappy crime dramas" (Cold Case, Numb3rs, Criminal Minds, etc. plus Flash Forward), all of which he refuses to watch with me.  I don't watch every episode of every show, but will record them and save up big piles of laundry to fold so I can watch whichever one strikes my fancy that day guilt-free while I'm "doing something productive."  I watch The Colbert Report on my laptop as I do the dishes each day, which only occasionally leads to me distractedly breaking dishes.

Mark and I enjoy watching Glee and giggling together.  But my current favorite grownup shows are House and The Middle. I don't know what it says about me that I love House's mean, sarcastic humor, but I do.  Also, House is brilliant, broken, lonely and an addict, all of which I find extremely attractive in a man.  Mark loves watching it with me in spite of the fact that I whisper "Hot!" whenever Hugh Laurie appears on screen.  I find a lot of The Middle laugh-until-I-can't-breathe funny because there is always something that reminds me of our family.  (Most recently it was the fact that the Heck family discovered they had only four dining room chairs for five family members, but hadn't noticed because they always eat in front of the TV.  We, and this is the absolute truth, actually own just three dining room chairs for the four of us.)

I also have favorite kids' shows, of course, with Word Girl topping the list.  Sh!  Don't tell anyone (except the whole Internet), but Mark and I sometimes watch that even when the kids aren't around.

Glee (which has become my favorite new show) just had it's first-hals-of-the-season finale, tell me what you enjoyed about the season thus far, or about the episode itself.

I had mixed feelings about the finale.  I see Glee as very fluffy and two dimensional; it's about caricatures more than characters.  So, I think it's at its best when it deals with comedic issues like petty high school rivalries and crazy cover-ups.  I don't think it's particularly well-suited for having those kinds of situations explode in a dramatic way, because it's hard to get emotionally invested in caricatures.  So I haven't been as happy with the last few episodes (where many of the comedic elements have turned dramatic) as I was with the farce continuing.  But overall, I'm still willing to watch again when the show returns in the spring.

I don't mind telling you that, although I came to the show late (at the urging of Mrs Gunfighter), I enjoyed it and I am looking forward to the return.

Let's turn to one of my other favorite topics:  Books.  I love to read, and I always wonder what other people like to read, as it is often so different from the things that I like.  Who are your favorite Characters in literature? (I use the term "literature" loosely)

I read voraciously (and don't use the term literature loosely) so this is really difficult.  Peter Pan.  Hamlet.  Macbeth.  Viola (from Shakespeare's Twelfth Night).  Heathcliff (from Wuthering Heights).  Sydney Carton (from A Tale of Two Cities).  Frodo Baggins (from The Lord of the Rings).  Quentin Compson (from The Sound and the Fury).  Agatha Christie's detective Hercule Poirot.  Jane Eyre.  Nearly anyone from a Jane Austen novel.  Hm.  I'm seeing a disturbing lack of female characters.  I guess that's what I get for reading the classics.  I'm also noticing that they're not exactly a group anyone would exactly want to hang out with, and yet, I do hang out with them, quite a bit.  Analyze that as you will.

I won't analyze that at all.  Anyone who admires the wretched Hamlet can be a friend of mine.

Shifting gears, I'd like to ask you a more personal question:  Do you have any tattoos?  Where are they?  What are they? If you dislike tattoos, tell us why.

I do have a tattoo.  And it was actually another blogger, The Junky's Wife — who has become one of my closest real life friends — who took me to get it as a birthday present.  I'm not going to tell what or where it is, because I don't like to give out potentially identifying details.  But I will say that it's very meaningful to me and I'm so happy I got it.

No worries on the identifying details, I get that.  Back to the tattoo... would you get another?

I would totally get another one.  In fact, I keep coming up with ideas for what I might like (and where) but none of them have been quite the right fit yet.

I understand that, too.  All of my tattoos are very personal to me, and have to mean more than looking cool (which they do... for real!)

Like me, and so many of the people that are going to read this, you are a parent.   Tell me about your "Parenting style"

I believe my children learn more than anything else, from my example.  So the most important thing I can do as a mother is to model the kind of person I want them to grow up to be and to keep working on myself so that I can be that person.

That sounds sane.

 Have you ever committed an act of violence?  If so, do you, in retrospect, think that you acted appropriately?  Did you, you know, sort of like it? (you can tell me, I totally understand!)

Well, I do have my violent impulses, but I've got the opposite of poor impulse control; my restraint would kill lesser mortals.  In fact, if everyone in the world were like me, there would be no more wars; we'd all just make snarky passive-aggressive comments about each other and secretly seethe with suppressed rage until we exploded in tears or a single maniacal scream.  Then we'd apologize. 

The very few acts of violence or destruction I've committed tend to be fairly calculated.  I remember getting so mad at my boyfriend in college that I wanted to smash something, but rather than picking something up and just chucking it at a wall (or his head), like a normal human, I stood there looking around my room and thinking, "No, I don't want to break that, I like it.  And I don't know if I could replace this.  And that other thing doesn't belong to me."  After much thought, I decided I could safely break a light bulb.  It would make a satisfying smash yet be completely replaceable.  But of course, I couldn't do it in the room, because what if I got glass got on my roommate's bed or my books?  So, I actually took a spare light bulb, went outside and searched the campus until I found a very safe and abandoned wall, smashed the light bulb against it, and then cleaned up after myself.

I've blogged about my only act of violence in recent years: hitting my husband the night I learned he had a sexual addiction.  But I you should note that I waited very politely until he invited me to hit him and gave him time to take his glasses off, so I wouldn't break them.  I do think the impulse to smack the crap out of him was a very genuine response for the place of deep hurt I was in.  It's not how I would handle a situation like that now, but I think it was appropriate at the time.

And I can't say that I particularly enjoyed any of my (few) violent acts (such as they are).  They simply weren't very satisfying.

Well I can tell you, as someone who makes a living from the potential use of extreme violence that not being satisfied when you have acted violently is a very very healthy thing.  You shouldn't like it... even when it is the right thing.

OK, tell me your thoughts on the following random (well, one of them isn't random) people:  Martin Luther, Axl Rose, Tavis Smiley, Daisy Fuentes

Hm.  I know this is an extremely boring answer, but apparently I don't have any thoughts on any of those people.  I actually had to Google two of them because I wasn't sure who they were, which probably just proves how terribly out of it I am.

Do you mind telling me which ones you had to Google?

I thought it might be more fun for people to have to guess.  ;)  

I'm not touching that one.  Let me ask you this:  When greeting people,  Are you a hugger or a handshaker?

Total hugger.  There seem to be so many nuances to handshaking; I've seen whole lessons in how to do it correctly.  Grasp firmly, but not too firmly.  Be relaxed but not too relaxed.  Don't let go too soon or hold on too long.  I have to admit, I've never been able to grasp the whole process.  (Pun fully and brutally intended.)  And woe to anyone who doesn't do it the right way.  I've heard I won't get the job or the friend or the big break, because everyone will judge me in that split second and find me wanting.  I don't need that kind of pressure.  Hugging, on the other hand (or would that be both hands), comes very naturally to me.  I can even do it online.  {{{Gunfighter}}}  See!  But I have no idea how to shake hands with you.

Fair enough, but let me give you a quick tutorial:  firmly clasp hands (the whole hand, not just the fingers) give a firm squeeze, pump once and let go.  That's to greet a new acquaintance... you may choose a lengthier shake for someone you know, but not well enough to feel comfortable hugging.

Moving on, one of the things that I found out about you when I drew you as the subject of my interview, was that we have something in common:  We are both married interracially (at least, as some people construct race... but that's another story).  

Does the fact that you and your husband are not of the same ethnicity have any direct on your marriage?  Are interracial marriages common where you live?  Do you find, that people treat you, or your children differently?

Being different races has less of an effect on my life and marriage than I thought it would before I got involved with my husband.  Being from different backgrounds, and knowing that we would encounter difficulties from outside the relationship, really forced us to discuss a lot of issues before we made the decision to get married.  We haven't encountered a great deal of overt discrimination, although we are sensitive to it and tend to avoid places where we've felt uncomfortable.  I think the biggest problem we had came from our own parents, who weren't (at least initially) very excited about the prospect of either of us marrying someone from another race.  Both of our fathers told us they were disappointed when we announced our engagement, and it was very much because they were afraid that we (and our children) would suffer for it.

Oddly enough, it hasn't mattered much.  Most people just seem to notice us, but not necessarily in a negative way.  We just stand out.  We had one funny experience going to a crowded mall at this time of year in a very white neighborhood.  We bought a gift at a department store and left it to be wrapped.  When we came back to pick it up, we didn't even have to give our name.  The employees were holding it out for us with a smile when we walked up to the counter.  In spite of the fact that there were hundreds of other shoppers there that day, the store employees clearly remembered, not the Joneses, but the black guy and his white wife.

We were also traveling together once to an area where the thought of an interracial couple seemed so far from people's minds that they sometimes didn't recognize that we were actually a couple (in spite of the fact I was pregnant at the time).  We had people address us and ask to help us separately, as if we both just happened to walk in at the same time.  Oddly, I kind of liked that.  It made me feel safer.

I expected before I had kids that more people would ask me if my children were adopted, but to my surprise, that question has come up just once.  In contrast, I've had several people tell me the kids look like me, which I love, because my kids are absolutely gorgeous.  It's a great compliment.

 Oh, trust me, we got the "What about the children" crap, too.  Of course, in my experience, people who say that, aren't really concerned about the children as much as they say.  As it turns out, my kids are seriously well-adjusted people... and they look like their daddy! (which makes them gorgeous too!)

On my blog, I talk alot about my job... tell me, if you could  choose any occupation, without regard to how much money you would/could make, what would you choose that would make you happiest?

I would choose to do exactly what I'm doing now, spending time with my family and doing the kind of writing I want.

Awesome.   How do you feel about men in Kilts?

I kind of dig them.

Which makes you a very smart lady indeed.

 
I suppose I should stop asking you question now, as I feel that your eyes may be glazing over.  Thanks so much for agreeing to be my victim subject!  Anything else for the good of the order?

 I want to say thank you for taking the time to interview me and for inviting me into your corner of the blogosphere.  It has been a pleasure to get to know you. 

The pleasure was mine, indeed!

 

Blogger Interviews: Gunfighter

No, I didn't interview myself (again).  This time I was interviewed by Aunt Becky, who is super cool, and VERY funny. 

Here is the interview... read it, and then go visit Becky'sblog.  I'm betting that you will become a regular.

 

For Neil’s Great Blog Interview Project, I Interviewed Gunfighter who is pretty full of the Awesome, so you should check him out. And I’m not just saying that so he doesn’t kill me. He rules.

Katie Couric better watch out because I had WAY too much fun with this interview.

1) Sprinkles on ice cream or not? Or do you call them jimmies? Some people call them jimmies and I don’t understand it, but I think it’s a colloquialism like “soda” and “pop.”

Ha!  I was just talking about this a week or so ago.  For me, you only have sprinkles on soft-serve ice cream… and then only when you get it from the “Mr. Softee” ice cream truck that would come through our neighborhood in the summer.  As for what you call them, I always called them jimmies.  I understand that it is a fairly common thing in the northeast (I was raised in northern New Jersey.  Go Yankees!).

2) Are you going to kill me if I mess up this interview? I’m screwed, aren’t I? (don’t shoot me, please, I have delicate skin)

Shoot you?  Naaaah, I probably wouldn’t shoot you… you seem like a nice enough person… and you make me laugh, which goes a long way.  Not that you need to worry, or anything… because you are doing fine… so far.

3) If you could choose one single song for them to do on Glee to die a happy person, what would it be?

You know, my wife and I were listening to the Glee soundtrack when I got your email with these questions… we agreed that it would really be beyond cool (and I mean cool in the sense of Miles Davis, and Lou Rawls) if the cast of Glee performed Mel Torme’s iconic hit “Coming Home Baby”. If they were to do that, I would be a really happy man… that song or the them from “Underdog”

4) What annoys you most about blogging? Everyone has some pet peeve. As for me, I can’t stand it when people abbreviate people into initials because my brain is too small to handle and retain such information for long enough to make it through a post.

You mean bloggers can be annoying?  Never!  Well, ok, since we are new pals and all… I’ll just say this about that:  Sometimes bloggers are just a little too sanctimonious… and that probably means me, too.

5) You’re sent to live on a desert island with an iPod filled with the collective works of only 5 musical artists (let’s assume somehow you have unlimited power for said iPod). Who are they?

Mel Torme  (don’t laugh.  Mel Torme was as cool as they get)

Michael Jackson  (Dude was weird, but name a really talented person who isn’t/wasn’t)

David Phelps  (Look him up, he’s awesome)

Frank Sinatra  (Frank doesn’t need any commentary)

Tuck Andress & Patti Cathcart  (An incredible Jazz duo)

6) What’s the song that plays in your head every time you walk into a room? Like when you make an entrance, I mean. Not just like when you walk unnoticed into a room.

Oh, you mean personal theme songs?  I have several, and they vary depending on what I am walking in the room to do.  When I am walking into a classroom to teach, the song is “The Imperial March” from Star Wars (also known as “Darth Vader’s Theme”), The other, when I am on an operational assignment is the Main Title theme from “Superman“.  Often, in my everyday life, my theme song is that favorite hymn of mine:  “A Mighty Fortress is Our God” … there isn’t a much better song for a warrior.

7) If I came over to your house to eat dinner, what would you make me? Because you seem to be a good cook and I sometimes can’t be bothered to order takeout because I am JUST that kind of lazy and maybe I am kind of hungry right now.

I would probably roast a chicken with vegetables.  Oh, and I do a chicken right, my friend.  Mind you, it’s a rich dish, and ought to be shared with good friends and an ample supply of wine.  To die for, trust me.

Now that I have read your archives, I have realized that my brother would salivate at the bit to be your best friend, (which I will lord over him as punishment for years of torture when we were kids) which means I need to be your best friend. Can I be your best friend?

Interesting… why would he want to be my best friend?  Is it because of my tattoos, or because I have a rockin’ family?, or is it because I spend my day playing with guns?  Maybe it’s because chicks dig me.  Well, whatever it is, I am all about revenge on older brothers for childhood torture, so ok, we can be best friends.  Do you hear that, Becky’s brother?  She and I are BFF’s now, so don’t **** with her ever again!

So you should check him out because seriously, he’s awesome.

———————

And in the interest of full disclosure, I am going to tell you that my brother, Uncle Aunt Becky, would want to be BFF with Gunfighter because he would love Gunfighter’s job. Also, now I am going to visit Gunfighter so he can teach me how to shoot a gun. (but he doesn’t know that yet. He better get that chicken cooking. HA.).

 

OK folks... go visit Becky, there's a good chap.

20 Questions With Mrs Gunfighter

Today we have a special treat for all of you.  Today, I am going to interview My lovely wife, special friend, and best pal:  Mrs. Gunfighter.

Welcome, sweetie!  I have wanted to do this for a long time, and I am really glad that you finally agreed to do this.

I guess I'll jump right in and ask you some questions… feel free to answer at length if you like, but since this is a written medium, I'll have to ask you refrain from giving me looks in answer to my questions.  Deal?   

Absolutely—My face will remain carefully expressionless—just like when I’m looking at food I don’t want to eat! [Hahahahahahah]

1. Why don't we start with some biographical information.  Tell the readers about yourself.

Well, just to refresh your memory, I’ve been married to you for almost 14 years and we have a 9-year-old daughter. I am a professional historian and I make educational films for one of the smarter government agencies, although I started out my career as a newspaper journalist. I love reading, type fonts, and my Amazon Kindle. I hate stupid people, beef, talking on the phone, and George W. Bush. Is that enough for a start?

2. Great... I have to ask this for the sake of the folks who only know you as Mrs Gunfighter.  Considering that you kept your family name when we got married, does it bug you at all that I refer to you on my blog as Mrs Gunfighter?  If it does, I'll be glad to call you something else.

No—that way I know you’re talking to me.

We had a child-free, soccer-free weekend, did you enjoy yourself?

Yes, I did, although I would have preferred a dry weekend so that I could do more planting.

3. It was your idea to go and see Iron Man (the second time, for me).  To tell you the truth, I was surprised, pleasantly, mind you.  What did you think of the movie?

I thought it was really good and since it only had cartoon violence, I didn’t even have to keep my eyes closed. Robert Downey Jr. was really good as Tony Stark—a first class performance.  Gwyneth Paltrow didn’t offend me as much as I thought she would, but her really high heels were a constant source of irritation. Tony Stark’s house was beautifully furnished and had a really lovely waterfall/staircase. I liked it a lot!

4. You are very astute, politically, babe… in fact, you are the Chair of our local Democratic Committee.  What do you think about the chances for Democrats in Congress this election cycle?  Do you think that we will achieve a working majority in the House and Senate?

Yes—I’m very optimistic. Even the least politically aware (i.e., the stupid) in the United States have to have noticed that things aren’t going well and perhaps it’s time for a change. There’s a very good NY Times article from last week by Tom Friedman called “Who will tell the People.” I highly recommend it.

 

5. Since we both Support the candidacy of Senator Barack Obama, and since this is your husband's blog, why don't you tell the readers what you think of the Senator and why you believe that he will be the next President of these United States?

Well, I’ve done some speechwriting in my time, and I think a great speech is really a thing of beauty. Obama is the kind of orator we haven’t seen since Bobby Kennedy. What a nation believes about itself is extremely important (“We have nothing to fear except fear itself”) and unless we have a leader who make us realize that we can fix our problems, the country is done for. Diverse groups who haven’t been active before are starting to look around and see themselves as part of a movement. [As an aside, in a funny way, popular tv always reflects the state of the nation’s psyche. I think that shows like Idol and Dancing with the Stars are a reflection of a desire for story where someone rises above and succeeds.  I don’t think it’s a coincidence that there are so many “reality” shows with this format.]

 

6. What do you think of the way Senator Clinton has run her campaign?  Have your opinions about her changed at all from her husband's White House years to now?

I’m really going to try not to let my feelings based on my personal experience with her color this answer…or maybe not! I’m disgusted with her campaign.  Honestly, before the campaign began, while I wasn’t about to crown her, I could see myself voting for her. Today—absolutely not. I was a Clinton supporter long before you were, and I’m so sad to see how far they’ve fallen. They have moved race front and center in their campaign—from the innuendo in South Carolina to openly discussing how “hardworking white voters” support her today. They’ve made that discourse acceptable and for that I can never forgive them--ever. As one commentator said last week, even Richard Nixon in his southern strategy never used the word “white.” The idea that she’s some sort of man of the people—while attending the same schools as Obama and having a career as a high priced lawyer—is such a joke. Someone should tell her that where I grew up, women didn’t do shots with beers…or should I say only skanky women did! Pathetic.

 

7. Enough about politics…. Tell the readers, if you would… how cool is it to be married to Gunfighter?  I mean it has to be a major rush all of the time, right?

24/7. I don’t even have words to describe how thrilling it is to throw your dirty clothes in the hamper. Although you are a terrific cook and a pretty nice guy (for a trained killer)!

 

8. Thanks, babe... I think.  I'll work on that clothes issue (I hope that you liked your dinner last night)  Changing the subject… you have rather eclectic tastes in music.  Care to tell everyone about the music that you like.

Well, my musical tastes aren’t static!  At home I like to listen to jazz, blues, Frank Sinatra (fabulous!) and global fusion music. At work on my desk, I’ve got Pink, Jane Monheit, George Michael, and the sound track of “Man of La Mancha” because Richard Kiley is the best Broadway baritone ever. Having said that, when I’m in the car I always listen to XM’s 20 on 20, because I like new music.  At the moment, I like Timbaland and Chris Brown. The new Madonna song (I never bother to learn their names, as you know) isn’t bad, but I can’t stand Mariah Carey’s new one. I just think her music is insipid and she doesn’t look very smart to me… My favorite song of all time is Bob Marley’s “Redemption Song.”

 

9. How about when I play my head-banger music… does that bother you?  and tell the truth, Ozzy Osbourne has buckets of talent, doesn't he?

Yes, I hate screaming guitars and often choose to find something to do upstairs. Ozzy’s slow songs are lovely—he’s an interesting person.

 

10. Moving on… you are a prolific reader.   What is your favorite genre of books?

That’s a tough question. I mostly read nonfiction. I feel in love with history when I was in elementary school.  My favorite personage was Cleopatra because, well, she was one of the few women who got a starring role. I’m totally thrilled that—without prompting or any suggestion from me—Soccer Girl has checked out all of the Cleopatra books from her school library. Today, I mostly read whatever interests me at the moment.  I’m currently in a major China phase.

11. Who is your favorite author?

I’ve got different ones:  Dorothy Dunnett for her wonderful House of Niccolo and Lymond Chronicles, the best historical fiction written ever. While I prefer Nicholas, both series are fantastic. (That’s in case you have any Dunnett fans in your readership. We always have to state our allegiance up front.) I also love Wilton Barnhart’s “Gospel”, a modern day story about the ancient church—it’s actually much better than it sounds—and Lisa See’s “Peony in Love.”

In mystery, I enjoy Elizabeth George for her finely crafted Lynley series (the books not the tv series) and Lisa See’s detective series. As an aside, I spent a lot of time in the rather run down English seaside town that was the setting for one of George’s books, and she had the feel of the place absolutely perfectly.

In history, you can’t do better than “Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire.” Seriously. Gibbon’s footnotes are very witty and a real treat.  Okay, maybe’s it’s an acquired taste…

12. Now, I'm going to open the floor for a moment.  You are quite the enthusiast on home design.  As a matter of fact, you are in the middle of transforming our home into your new vision.  Why don't you tell us about that?

I’m very visual and so the way that things look is important to me. I think your personal style has to reflect who you are (your junk), fit your lifestyle (easy to clean), and look good (lots of books). Our living room/dining room/kitchen is in the process of transformation into a global fusion style with Chinese accent pieces from my trip to Beijing. I think a totally Chinese room would look forced, but a bench, a canvas, and a Buddha are enough. I have a friend who did her living room Chinese (you know who I mean) and it didn’t work at all. Our new red kitchen is going to be fabulous. I decorate rooms the way they strike me—that’s why our bathroom is a salute to the French Fauvists, the downstairs bathroom pays homage to Britain, and our bedroom is going to be a sort of Danish modern salute to the 18^th century.  I can’t wait to put up the giant wall map of Rome! My mother hates every single room in our house!!!!!

13. "My mother hates every single room in our house!!!!!"  Baaahahahahahahaha!  She does, doesn't she?  Well tough shit for her!  That's what I say.  Sorry... I had a moment.   Tell everyone about your love of paint.

I adore paint and will happily spend hours and hours thinking about it!!!! I currently recommend Benjamin Moore’s new Aura line, which is possibly the best paint ever.  We tried a sample on a wall that’s never been painted (except by the builder) and it covered perfectly on the first coat without being absorbed into the dry wall. Paint is fab! Fan decks are always thoughtful gifts.

 

14. If we can silly for just a moment, I'd like you to talk about some of your choices for television viewing.  I mean, I get the design shows, both for home and clothing, but you also watch, with some intensity, Flavor of Love, Rock of Love, and that show with Tila Tequila…. What's that all about?

Can I be snobby for just a minute?  I have a Ph.D. and I spend all day with a bunch of other Ph.D.s. I don’t watch tv to enhance the intellectual part of my resume.  If I want intellectual, I’ll read a book not watch PBS. Basically, all tv is kind of crappy, but there’s nothing wrong with that. I love “Rock of Love” because I don’t know any people in the real world who think that prowess on the stripper pole should play a big part in the selection of a life partner! I also continue to watch because I want to know why someone can’t get Brett a better weave. Flav—an idiot, but every once in a while there’s a flash of a real human being. And Tila Tequila—well who didn’t think Danni was way too good for Tila and was secretly happy she chose that doofus instead? I just admit to watching what people really watch but are too weak to own up to!

 

15. Wow.  Just… wow.  Um, Ok… let's talk about your DVDs.  You have quite a few, which is really an understatement.  How are things working out now that you have those brand new DVD storage racks that I covered the wall of our office with?

Excellent!  I just have to do some organization. I don’t even know how many I have.  Maybe 500?

 

16. Tell everyone about your enjoyment of tabloid magazines.  Do you have a favorite in the conflict between Lauren "LC" Conrad and Heidi Montag?

Even I won’t watch “The Hills” because it’s just too stupid. If I HAD to pick, I’d probably go with LC. Heidi is just such a shameless publicity whore. Wasn’t it ridiculous when John McCain said that he watched this show???? Tabloids are great for looking at all the clothes and, well, who doesn’t want a front row seat the next time Ms. Spears goes off her rocker?

 

17. Summer is coming, and we are planning to send Soccer Girl to a variety of day camps and sleep away camps.  Do you want to talk about that?  Tell us the benefit of a busy summer for a child in the suburbs.

Soccer Girl is very social and she loves to be outside—two things I hate, so even if I was a stay-at-home mom, I’d still send her to camp. She’s looking forward to “horse camp,” and I’m happy to let her explore her independence a little. I think there are two main benefits for us. When she goes to day camp she comes home super tired, so we don’t have to haul her to the pool every night. Secondly, we might be able to get our long postponed trip to Water Country in while she’s gone. Pinky swear not to tell!

 

18. So, we're going back to Georgia and Florida in August.  I am sure you are looking forward to it as much as I am.  Tell everyone what you like most about our summer vacations.

I actually enjoy the preparation most of all. When I was a kid, I loved the anticipation and I still do. Of course packing is my single greatest skill, so I’m always looking for ways to top my previous personal best!

 

19. Of course, Disney World is very much a central part of what we do when we are in Orlando… do you ever get tired of that place?

Never. When I was very small (maybe 5), I had the measles. I remember laying on the couch and trying to watch tv, which was very difficult because the light hurt my eyes. But I kept them open because I was watching a Mickey Mouse Club rerun about the opening of Disneyland. I was entranced and never stopped thinking about what an amazing place it must be. We went to Disney World the year is opened and that sealed the deal for me. I don’t really care about characters, but the dimensionality of the place continues to fascinate me. When Soccer Girl was very small and she would nap in her stroller, I never minded just walking around for hours.

 

20. I concur.  I suppose I could get tired of that place, but don't expect that to happen before 2097... when I am 134 years old.  We have covered a lot here, today, babe… I'm going to end here by opening up the floor for anything that you would like to say in closing, so take it away!

This was fun—I’ve enjoyed meeting all of you!  Thanks for the ink/pixels.

There you have it, friends.  An introduction to the best person that I have ever known.  This wonderful woman who supports me fiercely, who loves me (and I'm not easy to love, if I'm going to be honest here).  This perfectly complex, super-smart, unassuming woman, sexy woman, has been my best pal since our first date... you can see why I love her so much.

Thanks for sharing, babe.

GF

An Interview

Hello all.

My new blog-pal, Anno has sent me some interview guestions to answer for her... here are my answers:

1. I just read your Thanksgiving post, and despite the fact that I've already had a wonderful Thanksgiving feast with a delicious wild mushroom bread pudding, I'm salivating over your corn bread stuffing. You cook. You coach soccer. You have a demanding job, and you are a dedicated husband and father. Not to mention the fact that you write thoughtful and interesting posts that happen to be fun to read. What don't you do?

I don't yodel, nor do I play the guitar.  One of those things would make me very happy.  I'll let you take a guess at which one.

Oh, I don't gamble, either.


2. And with all that you do, what motivated you to begin blogging?

Becuase I am a narcissist?  I blog because I like to write... and I want to be heard! (and all the cool kids are blogging, too!)


3. What are five things you hope to see happen in 2008?

1.  All American troops leaving Iraq

2.  George W. Bush & Dick Cheney impeached, and then indicted and tried for crimes against humanity.  (Surely, illegally, and immorally causing the deaths of nearly half a million people has to be worse crime than lying about a blowjob.  I mean, REALLY!)

3.  Dennis Kucinich, Barack Obama, Bill Richardson, Al Gore, or John Edwards, elected President of The United States.

4.  The Price of gasoline to come down to something close to $2 per gallon.

5.  Get my next tattoo (I want to do this by June).


4. Al Capone once famously said, "You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone."  What's your take on the role of guns and diplomacy?

I believe that guns CAN be a part of diplomacy.  Sometimes diplomacy includes talking tough.  You can't talk tough if you can't fight... it's seldom effective.  Having said all of that, I certainly don't think that diplomacy should go anything like this:  "Do what we say, or we are invading your country"


5.  Any plans for the further adventures of Hamish MacDonald and Abigail Carter?

Funny you should mention them, because I was back at it last night, while I was waiting for SoccerGirl's Brownie Meeting to end.  Mac and Abbie will be back, rest assured!

Interview (3)

I have been interviewed agin, by Viciousrumour from The Dead Letters. VR is a new reader who, apparently has been lurkig for a bit, after surfing in from Super Des' blog, she had some interesting questions. Here they are:

(1) You mentioned in the "10 Weird Things" that you are a professional gunfighter. That's not something you just fall into. Tell us about that. For me this invokes images of the old west and tumbleweeds. What does it take to be a "professional gunfighter"? Do you get to wear chaps?

Well, I am a senior tactical firearms instructor for a federal agency. What that means in plain English, is that I teach people how to fight with a variety of guns. How to fight with guns, as opposed teaching people how to basically operate guns. I have blogged about that in some detail here, have a look at that for a start.

What does it take to be a professional gunfighter? Lots of training. Lots of training and years of experience with a variety of weapons systems. Add to that a thorough understanding of the law, as it regards the Use of Deadly Force, as well as a deep understanding of the philosophy and psychology of killing for a purpose. Once you have all of those things, you need to find a job applying all of that. There aren't many. Sure, you could go to work for one of the many private military companies (PMC's) that are springing up all over the place these days... but a great most of those people are a bunch of cowboys.

You can't be a crackpot and do this sort of work. It requires a great deal of balance.

No... I don't get to wear chaps, but if I could get away with wearing spurs, I would. Not because I need them, mind you, just because they are so cool.

Have I ever mentioned that The Outlaw Josey Wales is one of my favorite moives?

(2) You mentioned in your post about the onion soup that you have a "cheap palette". Do you think that "gourmet" food is over rated? Give us your best argument for good old fashioned cooking.

Oh, there is nothing wrong with gourmet food. I can cook that stuff, and usually make it better than the original bland recipes. I will say, however, that the best gourmet cooking has a tough time when compared to simple fare like Meatloaf, or a really good cheese burger, or a hearty lasagna with some crusty bread and some screw-top red wine with good friends or family.

Gourmet food tastes good... no question about it, but some foods, like the ones I mentioned, are soul-satisfying.

(3) As I read through your blog, I get the sense that your an opinionated fellow. Being the father of a daughter, how have you taught her to speak her mind with out being "in your face" or disrespectful?

Well, being opinionated and being "in your face" are two different things. First, I think that having strong opinions doesn't mean that you spout them as loud as you can, as often as you can. A certain level of discernment is required. In children, it is important to teach the concept of respect. While we don't teach soccer girl to be a doormat, we don't teach her to lip off to people, either... especially to adults.

(4) Starting with your senior year, give us the songs that are the "soundtrack" of your life. One for each year.

We could be here all day for this one, but I'll take a shot at it. Please know that I had to Google for some of these years to jog the memory.

1981: Hungry Heart,, Bruce Springsteen (I'm a Jersey boy)
1982: Our House, Madness
1983: In A Big Country, Big Country
1984: Easy Lover, Pillip Bailey & Phil Collins So Tired, Ozzy Osbourne
1985: Don't You Forget About Me, Simple Minds
1986: Danger Zone, Kenny Loggins
1987: Lean On Me, Club Nouveau
1988: Sweet Child O' Mine, Guns 'n Roses
1989: Blame it on the rain, Milli Vanili
1990: Ice, Ice Baby!,Vanilla Ice (You know that you STILL dance to that)
1991: Black or White, Michael Jackson
1992: Two Princes, Spin Doctors
1993: Mr. Wendal, Arrested Development
1994: I'll Make Love To You, Boyz II Men
1995: This is How We Do It, Montell Jordan
1996: Killing Me Softly, The Fugees
1997: Going The Distance, Cake
1098: I Don't Want To Miss A Thing, Aerosmith
1999: Livin' La Vida Loca, Ricky MArtin (yeah, yeah, yeah... I know)
2000: Scream, Seven Nations
2001: Short Skirt, Long Jacket - Cake
2002: Fell In Love With a Girl, The White Stripes
2003: Hey Ya!, Outkast
2004: American Idiot, Green Day
2005: One Love, Hootie & The Blowfish
2006: We Belong Together, Mariah Carey
2007: Girlfriend, (Avril Leveigne)

Damn! That was hard! Please note that I am certain that there were some years where other songs made a bigger impact, but hey, that's memory for you.

(5) Do you think anyone can ever be Totally Honest?

That is a difficult question. I doubt that anyone can be completely honest, because we all, even the most honest of us, from time to time, tell a friend that their clothing doesn't make their butt look big... when they really do. From time to time we tell our children about Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny, or that mommy and daddy had the door locked because "we were talking, sweetie".

I think that TOTAL honesty, while a lovely concept, can be terribly hurtful.


If you are interested in participating, please see the following:

DIRECTIONS FOR THE INTERVIEW MEME

1. Leave a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions (if I don't have your email address, you can email me instead). I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

My Second Interview.

As you can see below, I have been interviewed again, this time by Joy.

Interviews can be fun. What I find interesting is the difference in the questions that get asked.


1) You're a relatively new blogger, it seems. What you made you start a blog and has blogging so far lived up to your expectations? Any surprises?

I started blogging because I am, at heart, a communicator. I love to talk to people, I love to listen to people... it's how I learn. I think some of it also stems from the fact that, as a kid, I wanted to teach high school history. Fortunately, I fell into a career teaching an entirely different subject. I also like to socialize, and blogging allows me to do that without expending my precious free time.

Regarding surprises... there have been a few... see my post about mommy bloggers from a few days ago. You can also check my archives where I have said similar things bout "My Lesbian Friends" (which was the actual name a post)


2) I see your hobby is making Rosaries (they're gorgeous). How did you get into that? And do you tell the guys at work;-)

You have seen my blog, and know that I take my faith-walk seriously. Mine is a mature, curious, seeking, and questioning faith, and as a result, I wanted to find out about other faith traditions than my own (I'm a Lutheran). I had always found the tradition of praying the rosary, as they do in the Roman church, to be interesting. One day, I googled rosary prayer, and I found a site called the "Ecumenical Rosary"... one thing led to the other.... I found out about the Anglican "rosary" ... saw "how to" websites and thought "I could probably do that" I gave it a try, and was hooked.

I like making things... it is so much more affirming that my profession, which is all about killing. It gives me some balance.

As for the guys I work with, yeah, they know... but most of the guys I work with are afraid of me.


3) Charlton Heston. Friend or Foe?


Foe. Charlton Heston, when not acting, is a bleeding idiot.


4) I see you are a "rugger" fan. Why does it appeal? (and why is American Football for woosses?;-))


American (Gridiron) football (which I played at school) can be fun, but it can be terribly dull to watch.

Rugby football is a game where everybody runs, everybody can score, everybody tackles, everybody can be tackled,and the play goes by much faster. Add the camaraderie of the game, and the lack of showboating and trash talking and there you are. Players of the American game think that they are tough, but 90 percent aren't fit enough to play rugby.... especially rugby union, which, to my mind, is the better of the codes.

What else can I say? Rugby is "The Game They Play in Heaven".

I'd love to play, but I'm just too damned old (and too fat) to start!

If anyone wants me to interview them, please let me know.

Interview

Greetings from Williamsburg, Virginia! We are away for a little rest/spring break. I'll be here off and on.

I have been interviewed, recently by Lawyer Mama... here is how it went:

1. How old were you when you learned to shoot a gun and who taught you?

The first time I fired a gun was when I was 12 years old, at Boy Scout camp. I was decent at it... it wasn't difficult to do since we were only using a bolt-action .22

I really learned my trade after I entered the Marine Corps at age 17... I was terrified of the sergeants, and did EVERYthing exactly as I was told. I guess they told me right. They told me that I was "a natural" I guess they were right.

2. If you had to choose another century in which to live your life, which one would you choose?

If I HAD to go back in time, not that I would want to... I guess I would have to pick the 17th century. Being a black man in America hadn't quite come to mean what it would mean in the 18th and 19th centuries, after cotton became King.

3. Who was/is your most memorable role model?

I learned to be a man from the characters in the books I read as a kid, and from emulating Captain James T. Kirk, of the Starship Enterprise. Go ahead, laugh, but it's true. My parents divorced when I was 5. My dad was a career soldier, he wasn't around much. I was also heavily influenced by two of my Sergeants when I was a young Marine (I enlisted when I was 17) Staff Sergeant Ralph Andrews and Master Sergeant Mike Wosika. They taught me to be punctual, to be proud of a job well-done, and how to lead.

4. How often (if ever) would you say that you experience racism?

Rarely. We live in a very diverse area. Occasionally a white woman passing me in the mall will clutch her purse to her side as I pass... not that it would really help her if I wanted her purse, mind you... I'm not a small guy.

This question reminds me of an incident that took place about 14 years ago... I was meeting Mrs Gunfighter for a drink after work. It was a beautiful late spring afternoon, and a white woman at the same crosswalk as me clutched her purse as we waited to cross the street. I told her to relax, and that I wasn't going to steal her purse. She seemed both relieved and embarrassed that I called her on it.

5. Is what they say about what men wear under kilts true? LOL!

Yes... as a matter of fact, it is!